DIVORCE IF IT HAPPENS, SHOULD THE CHILDREN BE INFORMED OR LET THE CHILDREN KNOW IN THE COURSE OF LIFE AFTER DIVORCE. -BEFORE DIVORCE TAKES PLACE, UNDOUBTELY THERE WILL BE INTOLERANCE, SHOUTING, MISBHAVIOUR OF ALL TYPES. -AS SUCH THE CHILDREN WHATEVER THEIR AGE WILL DEFINITELY SEE ALL THIS DRAMA AND WILL SURELY FEEL DISTURBED WHETHER INFORMED OR NOT. -NOW THE QUESTION ARISES WHETHER THE SHOULD BE INFORMED OR NOT. -MY ANSWER WILL BE THAT IT WILL BE BETTER TO TELL AND EXPLAIN THE CIRCUMSTANCES WHY IT HAS BECOME ESSENTIAL OF THE PARENTS TO DIVORCE AND ALL STAGES OF COMPROMISE AND ACCEPTANCE ARE ALREADY CROSSED AND THERE IS NO CHOICE LEFT EXCEPT TO GO INTO DIVORCE AND LIVE SEPARATELY. -HAVING SAID THAT IT WILL DEPEND ON THE AGE OF THE CHILD WHICH IS ESSENTIAL AS TO WHETHR THE CHILD BE INFORMED OR NOT. -IN AGE FROM 1-5 NO NEED AT ALL, AS MOSTLY THE CHILD REMAINS WITH THE MOTHER AND HAS NOT YET REACHED THE AGE OF UNDERSTANDING EXCEPT FEELING PERHAPS. -FROM 6-12: THERE WILL BE DISTURBANCE IN THE CHILD AND AS SUCH IT WILL BE BETTER TO EXPLAIN IN BRIEF AND IF ANY QUESTION IS RAISED,TO TELL FRANKLY BUT NEVER AGAINST EACH OTHER AS FATHER AND MOTHER. PERHAPS THE CHILD COULD BE EXPLAINED THAT YOU HAVE SEEN THAT YOUR FATHER AND I FREQUENTLY QUERREL AND SHOUT AT EACH OTHER. IN THIS DISTURBED MIND NEITHER I AM ABLE TO GIVE ANY ATTENTION AND ALSO SINCE I REMAIN DISTURBED, WHATEVER I DO IN HOUSE OR IN OFFICE, ALL IS FULLY AFFECTED AND MANY A TIME WORK REMAINS UNFINISHED OR NOT PROPERLY DONE. MY DEAR, I KNOW IT IS VERY HARD FOR YOU, BUT UNTIL I AM AT PEACE MY BEHAVIOUR TOWARDS YOU WILL ALSO BE INTOLERABLE AND PERHAPS UNACCEPTABLE AND PERHAPS REPRIMANDED WITHOUT ANY FAULT OF YOURS. BESIDES MY HEALTH IS ALSO DETERIORATING AND I ALL THE TIME REMAIN UNHAPPY AND DISTURBED. HENCE WE YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE TAKEN DECISION TO DIVORCE AND PART WITH. PERHAPS IT WILL BE A TEMPORARY PERIOD AS PEACE BUYING AND CORRECTING OURSELVES BY LIVING ALONE SEPARATELY TO GAIN EXPERIENCE WHETHER WE BOTH COULD AFFORD TO LIVE ALONE SEPARATELY OR NOT. -I ASSURE MY DEAR CHILD YOU WILL CONTINUE TO ENJOY OUR LOVE AND CARE AS NOW OR POSSIBLY BETTER AS WE BOTH WILL NOT BE DISTURBED AND I HOPE WILL BE AT PEACE AND IN ACCEPTANCE. -I MUST TELL YOU THAT IT IS PART OF LIFE WHICH THOUGH IS NOT DESIRABLE BUT IT IS REALITY, HENCE IT IS ESSENTIAL THAT YOU DO NOT THINK OF US/EITHER OF US AND DO ALL TO CONCENTRATE IN YOUR STUDIES AS THE BETTER IS YOUR PERFORMANCE AT SCHOOL, BETTER WE WILL FEEL RELIEVED. -AT THE AGE OF ADOLESCENCE, THE CHILD HAS REACHED A WHEN HE/SHE CAN WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT IS EXPLAINED NO DOUBT WILL FEEL DISTURBED IN HIS/HER STUDIES BUT WILL BE BETTER TO EXPLAIN AND EXPLAIN FULLY ABOUT ALL THE QUESTIONS RAISED WHICH WILL HELP THE ADOLESCENT TO UNDERSTAND AND RECONCILE TO THE SITUATION IF NOT QUICKLY BUT DEFINITELY AFTER SOME TIME. HOWEVER, IT IS ESSENTIAL TO AVOID DIVORCE BY ALL MEANS FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN, AND ALSO NOT KNOWING AS TO WHAT WILL BE THE LIFE BY LIVING ALONE AND/OR FINDING ANOTHER SOULMATE. AS ALL WILL BE UNKNOWN, ALL EFFORTS BE MADE PERHAPS IN THE DIRECTIONS AND/OR MANNERS AS SUGGESTED BELOW: -DEVELOP PATIENCE AND IF SAID OR BEHAVED WHICH IS NOT DESIRABLE AND EVEN NOT ACCEPTABLE, SHIFT TO SOME OTHER ACTIVITY AND MOVE AWAY FROM THAT PLACE, REASONING AS IF I HAVE NOT HEARD (II) IT IS HIS/HER HABIT (III) EVEN IF RETALIATED, IT WILL BRING NO GOOD AND WILL CERTAINLY HARM BY ALL MEANS. -LET ONE OF YOU START COMING LATE AND GOING EARLY -EACH ONE STARTS PREPARE TEA ETC. AND GETTING LUNCH AND DINNER FROM OUTSIDE OR BY COOKING HIMSELF/HERSELF. - READ LITERATURE ON DIVORCE AND DO CONCENTRATE AND ANALYSE AS TO HOW IS THE LIFE AFTER DIVORCE WHETHER ONE CAN LIVE HAPPIER - ALSO DO STUDY IN PARTICULAR WHETHER YOU WILL BE ABLE TO LIVE ALONE, WHAT WILL BE THE HURDLES AND IF EVER THINKING OF REMARRYING, 1STLY IT WILL NOT BE EASY AS DOUBTS WILL REMAIN PROFOUND AND UNDOUBTED REMARRIAGE WILL REQUIRE MORE TOLERANCE, ADJUSTMENT AND ACCEPTANCE THAN AT PRESENT. -THERE IS EVERY POSSIBILITY THAT AFTER HAVE READ A LOT AND REFLECTING FULLY ON THE FUTURE CONSEQUENCE, YOU MAY GET MORE REFLECT AND MORE TOLERANT AND POSSIBLY MANAGE TO MOULD AS PER THE ATTITUDE AND HABITS OF YOUR PARTNER - NEVER BELIEVE IN A DEFEATIST ATTITUDE, RATHER BUILD UP A WINNER ONE BELIEVING THAT HUMAN MIND NEVER REMAINS STATIC. IT DOES TAKE CHANGE, GENERALLY FOR THE BETTER BY REFLECTION AND UNDERSTANDING. -BELIEVE IN THAT YOU WILL DO ALL TO REMAIN CALM DESPITE ALL INCITEMENTS AND EXCITEMENTS, THERE IS NO DOUBT THAT THERE WILL BE NO CHANCE OF RETALIATIN AS NOTHING BEEN SAID IN CONTRIDICTION OR IN CRITICISME -BELIEVE ALSO THAT YOU HAVE TEACH MORAL VALUES TO YOUR CHILD/CHILDREN, AND IF YOU DESPITE ALL THIS TURMOIL, MANAGE YOUR AFFAIRS AND BRING BACK PEACE IN THE HOUSE, SUCH A BEHAVIOUR AND ACTION BY YOU WILL BE A LEARNING AND ACCEPTANCE POINT IN THE LIFE OF YOUR CHILDREN WHEN THEY WILL GET MARRIED. ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. By vasdevloond contacts 9811943867 vasdevkoond@gmail.com