BEFORE I ATTEMPT FAMILY CONFLIFTS, IT IS ESSENTIAL TO START FROM THE COUPLE AS TO HOW THEY, BEFORE MARRIAGE, MAKE A GOO CHOICE. (1) each one needs to analyse one's qualities and defects and jot these down (b) to divide these defects into optional, adjustable and not changeable at all. (3) optional will get easily eliminated, adjustable will happen with a desired good choice, not changeable shall remain the focus in meeting the choicesin personal contacts and look to compatibility (4) at times, even not changeable could be overlooked if the desired would-be partner attracts by her contact, wisdom, well thought over replies, frank and honest behaviour, adjustability, calm and patient attitude and maneouveribility and MOST IMPORTANT AT TIMES TURNS OUT THE DESIRED BEAUTY. (5) in making choice for beauty, one needs to decide whether one is looking for INNER beauty or EXTERNAL beauty (6) external beauty comparatively will be temporary and costly affair while internal beauty will be long lasting which will be appreciated by the concerned person and maybe criticised and depreciated by friends, relations and foes. (7) once tentative decision is made, and trial periods to understand each other , one needs to pivot on and continue analysing what one wishes for and feels as essentials (8) must judge by frequent contacts and meetings by raising questions which one feels are essential to know the personality of the other person and also to find how the other person reacts, appreciates or retorts in behaviour and/or in reply (9) to make up one's mind whether overall one is inclined to go ahead with relationship despite some weaknesses and/or unadjustable attitudes and behaviour and WHETHER ONE HIMSELF/HERSELF CAN COPE WITH BY CHANGING ONESELF AND NOT IMPOSING ON THE OTHER. (10) once this choice is made, do ensure meeting respective families and see how easy or difficult their behaviour and relationship seems to be (11) at times there may be resistance, if so, how to go about, to abandon the idea of relationship or go ahead despite negative attitude of one or both the families. (12) if decision is taken despite resistance from one or both families, must understand that THEIR LOVE SHALL REMAIN THE PRIMEMOST DESPITE ALL ODDS AND DIFFICULTIES.(13) to understand nothing is perfect, but initial steps as suggested above are the minimum essentials to arrive at a decision but MUST UNDERSTAND THAT IN RELATIONSHIP, adjustment communication, honesty, love for each other in reciprocity etc. etc. are essentials (12) to ensure that all goes through well, the HUSBAND WILL HAVE TO GIVE PRIORITY TO WIFE AND ENSURE BY ALL MEANS THAT SHE REMAINS HAPPY, LOVES AND ENJOYS THE RELATIONSHIP (13) last but not the least, if things do not work out as one wishes, THE HUSBAND MUST LEARN TO CHANGE HIMSELF THAN EXPECT WIFE TO DO SO, be sure his overtures will bring in more results than those expected from the wife, as wife as woman is much more sentimental and emotional and gets along more easily and more quickly than the man (14) husband as a man needs to be DECISION MAKER (15) both needs to understand and learn to abandon their habits and manners of ENTIRE FREEDOM and be ready to accommodate and adjust as best as suitable to each other. I think if such steps are taken, relationship between the desiring soul-mates .will result in to be most CONGENIAL , HAPPY AND LOVELY RELATIONSHIP.